Coffee, such a blessing!!

It was monday morning and I was out buying the groceries as usual. I stopped at merlo coffee to buy some beans for my coffee machine and they gave me a complementary coffee to take away.  Being close to God and leading a spirit filled life I am beginning to pick up on his quiet voice and follow his directions more and more readily.  I held the delicious smelling coffee in my hand and felt prompted to take it straight to my sisters work to give it to her.  So we piled in the car, groceries, children and I and off we drove.  We walked into the daycare centre to find her sitting in the staff room almost about to finish her break.  I handed her the coffee gave her a love and went to leave. Her boss and another staff member asked what I was doing there and I said I was just bringing a coffee in for my lovely sister.  What I didn't know was that morning my sister had been in a rush and hadn't had time for a coffee and had commented to God that she needed one. Not only was it perfect timing with her break but she had actually asked God for one, and not only that but her colleges had just witnessed Gods love through my obedience.  And it hadn't cost me a thing.  Such a simple thing for me to do that created such a blessing for others.  I encourage you to learn to hear Gods spirit talking to you.  Whether it be out shopping and you get that uncomfortable feeling inside not to buy that expensive shirt because there's one on sale just around the corner or just like me and having a thought to take a coffee to a friend.  If you can learn to trust and respond quickly to Gods voice he can lead you into so much joy and it just escalates more and more throughout your everyday living.

abortion spirit

Two months before my mum died she came to me and apologised for not wanting me when I was born.  She recalled the doctor saying she had a beautiful healthy baby girl and she was so upset believing that a baby boy would've won over my Dad and saved her marriage.  As a 15 year old I thought 'well thanks mum I was happier not knowing that but anyway I forgive you.' 19 years later I was sent a link of a women who had heard God telling her she had an abortion spirit. "You have the spirit of abortion in you because you do not value children as you ought.  You see them as a burden and something that would inconvenience your life."After reading this I started to tremble inside, there was definitely something not happy within me and so I went into my bedroom and began to pray and wait on God.  He took me back to when my mum was pregnant with me and showed me her inner secrets of her heart that I was not wanted.  From that moment on a spirit of abortion had followed me causing me to not be able to connect as I should've with my girls.  I had put it down to post natal depression and had tried to move on from it.  No matter how hard I tried to be in love with my girls, particularly my eldest there was always something missing.  I told the demon to leave and reaffirmed my forgiveness to my mum and slowly throughout the week I have noticed things in my home changing.  Its as though God is flowing all around me, his grace and mercy are teaching me to love my girls without it being hard work. He also showed me that the abortion spirit is so rampant in our day to day life.  It can be seen  in the way we so quickly and so easily give up on things when the going gets tough or when opposition comes agains us.  We abort our friendships, abort our marriages, our jobs, our churches, our commitments, our faith, even our youth are aborting their life with suicide, drugs etc.  After I had researched and the holy spirit had lead me to all this extra information about the abortion spirit I realised how much more of an effect it had on me, not just with my children.  I hardly ever would read a book through to the end, I would always be starting things and not finishing them... abortion spirit, you're no longer welcome here!  I pray that for those identifying with this now as you read that the power of God with his grace and mercy will set you free and come flooding around your life as he has mine.  I pray for freedom in your life and for his love to fill you deeply. Amen

faced fears = jet ski!!

I really love how God has this way of taking seemingly random exercises and places them together to solve a much bigger issue.  I'm talking about a few weeks ago when I wrote about fear and how I was learning to trust God in all things and remove fear from my life. Last week I shared with you about the pain of my mums death and this week God has put them together to show me how fear can steal away precious moments that ultimately should lead to joy.  You see when I met my husband he had a 701 superjet pole ski and on it he won 2nd place in Australia.  I fell in love with his passion and ability to succeed in everything he tried.  We eventually sold his ski and all toys to start our life of buying a house and cars etc.  Then children came along and with it the fear, for me, of dying and leaving my girls with no Mum.  It had so sneakily wrapped itself around me I hadn't even noticed.  I lost the adventure in me and started to fear the worst in pretty much everything.  My husband had looked at buying another jet ski and I had steered him away from it.  I had crushed him with my fear which eventually if left like it was would more than probably drive us down a very sad and boring existence full of emptiness and regret.  But our God is so great he never lets us go that far with out showing us a key or a safety line to grab.  So this is where he pulls it all together.  He pulled me out of the shadow of death and the fear of it by unveiling the hurt I was holding about Mum... last week.  He then in all his humour stops our heater timer on 7:01, then  as my husband opens his Facebook page theres a picture of a 701.  I say "thats supernatural" and have a laugh.  The very next night I was at my friends and we were soaking in Gods presence listening to music and the first thing to pop into my mind is... u guessed it.. a 701.  God very clearly showed me that my fears were stopping my husband from living to his fullness, and it was teaching my children to fear and to top it all off I was hindering myself of fun.  I went home very excited and told my husband he needed to buy a jet ski!! (wish you could see his face).  Within 12 hours he had caught up with an old friend from 10 years ago who happened to know someone bringing the exact model in from the states and they will be here tomorrow.  So not really knowing how we are going to pay for it... we have a jet ski ready for running in on saturday!!! God speed? I think so.  And the best part??? I'm free to be a child again, free to enjoy life.  To be the fun Mum I'd dreamt of being, having a go at everything and knowing that through it all God is by my side, with Angels ready to step up at any time.  No more fear for me. God has set me free!!
I found this written by Sally Miller and thought it be appropriate to share. She has paraphrased Psalm 23v4, Isaiah 41v10 and 1 John 4v18. I hope you like it.
IN TIMES OF FEAR
Don't be scared even in the shadowy places. I am God. I am in charge. Wherever you go, I'm with you - overseeing, protecting, guiding, loving. Don't panic. I am God. I'll give you strength and help, ideas and opportunities. When it seems like your safety net is fraying, I'll scoop you up in my gentle-but-calloused hands and hold you.
Remember, when you're held in My love there's no room for fear.  My love around you is so big it doesn't leave even a molecule of space for worry or anxiety.  The only time fear comes is when you think punishments ominous, nefarious shadow follows you.  I am God - a God of love.  I don't want to hurt you; I want to fulfill you through love.  Let me gently catch you, show you who you are, and who I'm making you to be: one perfected in My love.

Mum dies in tragic car accident

It's my Mums birthday today. She would've been 67.
I was only 15 years old, full of life and mischief.  Mum was taking my boyfriend and I down to stay at my  Dads for a few days of the school holidays.  We were talking about the beautiful day and the snow on the mountains and how we wouldn't be skiing that year but Mum would like to take me to Australia.  The car hit black ice on the bridge and spun out of control hitting the bank on the other side and killing my Mum.  I was flown to hospital by helicopter and when I came to my whole world came crashing down.  For me I wanted everything to stop.  I didn't want to think about living, about my future, about where I was going to live. I just wanted to go and hide, run away from it all, to be by myself so I could get my head around it and cry and cry and cry. But that didn't happen.  I was moved out of my home and into my Aunties.  Kept away from my sisters and my Dad and told to move on.  Every year on my Mums birthday, mothers day, christmas, my birthday, the date of the accident I would have a little tear, find some strength and smile through the day. Usually not saying much about how I was truly feeling to anyone. Just moving on.  This year, 19 years later it feels different.  I have cried all day. Both girls are at daycare and I'm actually on my own. I can hear God saying to me 'its ok to feel'.  Why does it hurt so much more when the walls come down and the pain is still there? It's like I have to break for God to mend me.  I'm allowed to feel hurt, I'm allowed to miss my Mum.  It's just crazy how long its taken me to understand that.  When you lose a Mum there's no replacing her, she leaves a massive gap.  But God has this way of filling in the missing pieces, he's always there with me.  He lets me cry and he gives me more than a shoulder to cry on. He wraps me in his love and gives me peace that passes all understanding.  Without Gods love, without the hope of seeing her again, I have nothing. He is my strength now, he is my hope, he is my parents, he is my best friend, he is my teacher, my comforter, my everything.

More encouragement please?

Do you find yourself waiting for someone, sometimes anyone, to give you the encouragement or approval you feel you need to keep going?  This has been on my heart lately and I'm seeing it more and more in myself and others the more I look.  I made a picture for my daughters room and spent a bit of time on it cutting out felt birds and making it look just so.  The first thing I wanted was for my husband to see it and say how good it looked.  Which he did.  In a man way which never has quite the enthusiasm I'd like but never the less he gave his approval and it made me pleased with my effort.  We had friends over on the wednesday and I was also happy when my girlfriend asked if I had made it and gave me her praise that I'd done a good job.  My inlaws stayed over  the weekend and I'd navigated the way into the bedroom to maybe get some notice but nothing was said.  How easy for me to get offended.  Had they even seen it?  Probably not.  But satan was getting in my head saying 'they don't like you, you're not very special, your cooking must be bad too because they didn't comment on it....bla bla bla.  Is it really that important to hear others approval?  We should know that if we rely on others to say the right thing we are going to live a life of disappointment.  Having self worth is important, so is not listening to satan's discouragement.  I know that my inlaws love me, I know they enjoy my cooking and I could really waste precious energy beating myself up about something that doesn't even exist.  If we know that God is for us then it shouldn't matter what others say or what they think of us.  Romans 8 v 31 If God is for us, who can be against us?  Psalm 118 It is better to trust and take refuge in the Lord than to put confidence in man.  The bible is full of learning gems telling us not to put our hopes on man but to hope on and trust in God.  Don't be discouraged when the words you want to hear don't come through for you from others. Remember that God's always with you cheering you on, so look to him for your every need. Also be the one that encourages others, you never know how badly they need to hear how great they look or well they're doing.  Be a blessing to those around you and you will be blessed in return.

Powerful waves of cleansing water

 I spoke to my friend that I haven't seen for a few months yesterday and what is truly amazing is that God had shown me a vision about her the day before.  I had seen her as a seal balancing a ball on her nose and on stage for all to see.  This is how her life has been, bystanders just waiting for her to mess up and drop the ball, always on display for people to judge.  How easy it is for us to be a bystander, ready and waiting to applaud or judge.  Have you ever thought what a struggle that gives the poor seal to perform under that pressure?  As we prayed together we saw God pulling her out of that place and setting her free.  Free to swim in the beautiful sea, washed over with the powerful waves of cleansing water.  Swimming into new depths and free.  As I was driving home this morning tears started flooding out from eyes as I thought of her hardships and pain.  God had given me a glimpse of how hard the past few years had been for her and it was breaking my heart. I love my dear friend so much and yet I had not let myself feel her pain.  I had been waiting for change to come for her and having hope for great things to be in her life but I had never felt like this before.  I was so grieved in my spirit to think I hadn't been there nearly enough for her and it took my heavenly Daddy to show me I had been like a bystander. I'm so sorry my beautiful friend.  I'm also so happy that we could paint this beautiful picture together of a new freedom and I pray that this resonates in the hearts of those reading this to be careful how you look at your friends.  Always have love and mercy.  Make a commitment to love with your words and build confidence in others.  Matthew 12 v 36 But I tell you, on the day of judgement men will have to give account for every idle word they speak.  So be careful the words you chose to speak about a person because you will be accountable for them.  Words are seeds of power, they can be uplifting and encouraging and produce a good harvest or destructive and produce a bad harvest for your life and those around you.  If when you're reading this you find yourself thinking yes, I'm like the seal, always messing up and always being criticised, always being judged I'm telling you that's not how God wants it to be for you.  Jesus offers freedom, a place of rest and peace.  I pray that God will give you the grace to forgive those that have made you feel judged and that he floods over you with his love and freedom.  If you find yourself saying yes, I'm a bystander I look at others and judge them, I pray that you will be able to receive Gods grace and forgiveness and instead of watching from the stands that you will jump in and help them swim to safety. May God bless your day today with great friends.

In heavenly places embrace me

When I'm standing in your presence I'm made blameless
When I call upon your name you're always there
Angels fighting for me remain nameless
Shouting holy to the one beyond compare

Your spirit draws me in and fills me
My cup overflows with your goodness
Your love knows no bounds nor your mercy
Sweet honey to my lips is your taste

I shall sing of your glory forever
praises of grace are my sword
truth wrapped around me
I shall fear not
You are my God
My Lord

In heavenly places embrace me
Lift me up to sit by your throne
On my knees I shall fall
because you forgave all
then you say stand up, you are home

Dance with me Daddy
I love you
Sweep me up off my feet
My dear friend
To have you so close
everyday of my life
I am blessed
I am blessed
I am blessed